sometimes, you choose quiet over socializing. this can mean a cozy evening with the internet and bad reality tv. this can mean shuffling from room to room. half-hearted scrubbing the same areas of the kitchen, bathroom…over and over. you can’t be bothered to move a box, but you’ll make sure the area around the box is spic-and-span. you’ll graze the cabinets, munching here and here. it’s better than a binge, slightly. at least most of what you consume is healthy. and you’ll flog yourself internally for not being stronger. strong enough to face what terrifies you. big bad bullies ready to attack on unsuspecting prey.
you’re almost 36, for god’s sake. put on your big-girl pants and lay the smack down.
“defending” can rapidly twist into choosing sides, and the irreparable divide that could occur…well, that’d be your fault, now wouldn’t it.
i couldn’t bare to live with it. please don’t make me.
“We now return you to your regularly scheduled smile…”